In 2014, we moved to Albuquerque, NM for Adam’s job, away from my family. I found myself feeling sick but not home sick. I quickly found a doctor, and wouldn’t you know it I was pregnant in this new city without family. I laughed because I was now 42 years old and cried because I didn’t want life’s experience to find me, but it did.
This time I was not that overwhelmed and with confidence as small as a mustard seed Luke 17:6 from God. I wanted it, life experiences, having miscarriages to know, that it wasn’t going to define me as unable. I am able to live an awesome life for the Lord with or without children and that God loves me and He’s able to grow me stronger in godly contentment. 1 Timothy 6:6.
I told it that I may never understand why I could not kiss my babies’ cheeks or experience sleepless night, but I do know that God is in control and I was CHOSEN 1 Peter 2:9, to be a witness for such a time as this for women to see a blessed and childless faithful woman of God. And that His Glory will shine in and through me.
My babies are the best children every and the smartest, they are perfect. My babies have the one and true God-Father, Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and yes the thoughts of them come and go but they leave me with a content heart.